If you’ve ever been in the online dating scene, you know it can be pretty rough out there. Heck, dating in general can be rough, especially if you are a single woman over 40! There are a slew of scammers and men just looking for hook ups. Not to mention the gentlemen (and I use that term loosely) who are are over 40 themselves but looking to date much younger women.
But really, dating is what you make of it and online dating in particular gets a bad rap.
I know it is hard to believe when you are bombarded with a plethora of just plain bad dating profiles, but lots of people do find love online. It can happen! I have several personal friends and people I’ve coached who have found “the one” through online dating.
When things seem bleak in the dating world, remember these three tips to help you attract love online.
- Tip #1 – Be yourself.
You need to be authentic when presenting yourself online. If you aren’t portraying yourself honestly, you are setting yourself up for failure. What do you think is going to happen when you meet someone and you aren’t really who you said you were? You are starting out with deception, and that may lead to a lot of first dates, but rarely any second.
Always post current photos, at least three or four, and make sure at least one of them is full-length. Try to show yourself in different situations. You may think you look cool in that picture with your hat and sunglasses, but it does nothing to show what you really look like. You always want to put your best foot forward, but don’t try to be deceptive. If you are looking for love online, just be yourself.
- Tip #2 – Be selective.
I disagree with the dating experts who tell you to write a general profile appealing to everyone just to get more dates. Their philosophy is date as many people as possible, then weed through them to find out who you want to keep around and who to discard. I personally find this approach exhausting!
You’ve probably already figured out what you want out of a relationship and the type of person you’d like to date. (If not, check out my Ready, Set, Date course – coming soon!) My advice, is to be selective and make your profile more specific. Show your personality in your profile and don’t be afraid to ask for what you want in a match. You can make this less intimidating to potential dates by giving “why’s” behind your likes, dislikes, and must have’s instead of just providing a list.
If something is a deal breaker for you, say you despise smoking, why waste your time with someone who smokes? It’s never going to work and you will be better off spending your time with someone who feels the same way you do.
- Tip #3 – Have a positive attitude.
If you go into online dating with a bad attitude, guess what you are going to get? I’ll tell you – a bunch of bad experiences! It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve been hurt or disappointed in the past, before you start online dating, get yourself in the right frame of mind. If you have a positive attitude and write your profile with a positive vibe you will attract more positive type people. If you flaunt your negativity, you might just scare of your positive perfect match.
And always remember, the next man or woman should not have to pay for the last one’s mistakes. Give everyone a clean slate and let them write their own story.
It is possible to attract and find love online. Just be yourself, be selective and keep a positive attitude. The rest will work itself out.
Think your dating profile could use a little help? Want some tips and advice on how to improve your profile to attract the responses you are looking for? Check out the My Perfect Profile program here. My Perfect Profile is FREE when you become a Singles Squad member!
YOUR TURN: What do you think? Can you find love online? Tell us your experience with online dating in the comments below.